After a long day at work I decided to walk down to the local hole in a wall pub. As per usual the place had more pipes than plumbers, and the few scant females that were there, I'd prefer them to not fix my pluming. So, when the too skinny for T.V. gentleman sat next to me I didn't object, and in fact I appreciated his company.
I'm not good at small talk, in fact I lack a great deal of social skills, it was as if he new this, and knew just how to get me started.
DO YOU THINK HUMANS ARE EVOLVING?
" I want to."
WELL, DON'T YOU THINK YOU HAVE MADE A GREAT DEAL OF PROGRESS IN THE LAST HUNDRED YEARS OR SO?
" I can't deny that. And when you think about it, one has to admit that we have become more aware of other. But on the other hand it appears that we haven't quite gotten over the hump the of the social ladder."
TRUE FROM MY PERSPECTIVE THE SOCIAL LADDER YOU SPEAK OF HAS NO BEARING ON ANYTHING AT ALL.
It was at this point that I got a real good look at my impermanent friend. He was so skinny that it looked as thought the skin was stretched tight across his skull, and his eyes were so blue that they seemed to glow.
"And just what is your perspective exactly?"
I AM DEATH.
At that moment I saw him as he was, a skeleton with blue glowing eyes. It was only a flash and then he was back to his skinny self.
"How can you be here?" I asked. "I'm sure someone is dying somewhere."
OH, YES THERE ARE PEOPLE DYING ALL OVER THE WORLD. HOWEVER, I'M PRIVY TO SOME INTERESTING INFORMATION. FOR EXAMPLE, THERE IS NO SEPARATION FROM ANY ONE THING. THE IDEA OF SELF AND OTHER ARE ONLY ILLUSIONS.THEREFORE I CAN BE EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE, AND NOWHERE ALL AT ONCE. NOWHERE AND NOW HERE, JUST ONE SPACE CAN CREATE SUCH DISTANCE, BUT THE FUNDAMENTALS ARE ALL THE SAME.
"Yes, I've heard that before, but things certainly appear real."
THAT IS BECAUSE EVERYTHING IS RELATIVE.
"If everything is relative, then all sex is incest."
FUNNY YOU SHOULD MENTION THAT, THERE HAS BEEN STUDIES THAT SUGGEST THAT YOU HUMANS ALL COME FROM A PAIR OF ORIGINAL HUMANS. AT LEAST THE BIBLE GOT THAT MUCH RIGHT.
"Way to ruin a joke."
SINCE I HAVE TO HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR ABOUT MY OCCUPATION. I RUIN EVERYONE'S TRUE JOKE. THEIR EGO.
I then brace myself for the ultimate question. The question that can make or break humanities place in the universe. " So, do us humans have free will?"
He said without hesitation, I KNOW I DON'T...
